A Giveaway for Your Common Needs - Come hangout with us!

Ruby

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@Totalanimefan: it was fun! I was staff right before winter solstice, so I got to see a little of the behind the scenes and stuff. I even prepped 3 of those EIs haha
But this one I got to see from start to launch so that was cool :3 I prepped and uploaded 3 of these items too ^^

Totalanimefan

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@Ruby: That's pretty cool. ^^ I'm sure you are an appreciated part of Voltra's staff. ^^
Onward to the next event, I guess. How have you been other than that?

Ruby

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@Totalanimefan: idk, I hope so lol
Summer’s coming B)

I’m alright, got lots of new clothes recently, got my hair cut, actually trying with my appearance again xD

How about you?

Totalanimefan

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@Ruby: I'm ready for summer. I don't even know what this summer is going to be like with most of us having had our shots. I think it might be exciting but also a bit stressful getting used to that kind of life again.

Oh that's nice! I need my haircut again but I have to wait just a bit longer. My husband did cut it for me in Nov. He didn't do a bad job at all, but I think it's time I get it cut professionally again. I bought a few new clothes but I recently rebought my makeup. They were all expired and from 2019 or older. So Yikes lol.

As for my day today, I've been applying to more jobs. A friend is coming to mine at the beginning of June (fully vaxxed) but he just told me that for over half the trip he will still be working and his husband might not be coming but I already booked two museums lol. That's what I get for assuming (they are free anyway in DC)

SorrowTheMad

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@Ruby: Nah I'm mean! :P Lol

@Totalanimefan: Totally understand. Inability to communicate in a proper way bothers me too, so I get it.

Yeah, we moved around to a lot of different churches throughout my life. I was raised Lutheran but my parents even sent me to Catholic school just to make sure I got "all the god I need" during the week. No wonder I was so rebellious lol. I know Dean because he was in a band (drummer) at our church and they actually made it pretty big, big enough to be on secular radio. So in support of Silverline (the band), my dad basically went to every Minnesota concert he could that they did, and that's how we all became friends. My parents are all for that sort of hive-mind mentality though, call people who vote non-Republican "not real christians" or "devil worshippers," and just move along to another church if one doesn't deliver the exact message they think all christians should believe. It's insane. Sorry to hear you had a rough experience with churches, but on the plus side, it could be worse. I've seen people get "invoices" for what their weekly tithe was supposed to be when they didn't pay the usual amount.

You're fine at explaining yourself, I just had a blonde moment I guess. I seriously have no idea how I misread what you said but clearly I did lol. I get it, some people just aren't very confrontational, and I'm VERY much the opposite. Glad you gave that woman the what-for though :) And hey, you're my friendo, I'll always try to understand and talk things out with you :) Even if we disagree, like I said. I'm not egotistical enough to ever think I'm right about my opinions or beliefs, and I love trying to learn how people see the world if I can.

Totalanimefan

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@SorrowTheMad: I read your whole reply, and I'm about to go on a rant, so sorry. lol

Oh Lordy don't even start me on Tithe. While I do believe that if you use a service or you are involved in the community you should give back and you should strive to be a good member of that community.
With that out of the way, I just think that tithe can be very predatory. Never mind those mega churches that's a whole other can of worms, but even with like regular churches they always pretty much make you give 10% no matter what.

In 2008 my mom lost her job (as did a lot of people) and the unemployment wasn't even enough to make the bills. According to the church you were to give the 10% still. Even though for many years when my mom was doing well (read richer than most people at my church) my mom gave the 10% plus a few dollars cash to make my sister and I feel like we were giving too. But not that my mom can barely keep above water she is still suppose to give? No, F that. She needs to pay for a roof over her/her families head. She needs to be able to eat, to be able to pay the electric bill, etc. Plus at least in the last 15 years I had had lived enough to know about money back then. I saw her give A LOT every week. Surely she has given enough so that during these times it's ok that she is not giving. And what did the church ever do for those that were suffering in 2008/2009? Nothing.

Anyway, It's ok. I misread things on the internet all the time, and you were having a tiring day that day too, it's all good. I just can't live my life where every hill is the hill I die on. I don't have the energy for that. lol I even thought about not saying what I said and just nod my head but I just had to plant that seed. And it probably never grew, but I couldn't be quiet about it.

Totalanimefan

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Also to people that are apart of the church or are Christian, there is NOTHING wrong with that. I still believe that Jesus died for our sins. I just have a problem with churches and people that hate others and use christianity as the reason. They just give us all a bad name, but I also can't be apart of the church with the way they are.

Totalanimefan

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@Ava: What you said in your first paragraph is so true. People don't understand it at all and they think that it means one thing and it really doesn't. You do you, but I feel like because of all of the misunderstandings that you don't have to share it with people unless you really want to. It's just too hard to explain how it really is. At least when people are young, and/if they are on meds you normally can't tell at all. Honestly the only reason why I trust that you have it (besides the fact that I trust you and you have no reason to lie to me) is because you have said that line about the police. While I think that the police are horrible in the US there probably isn't a single officer in your area that knowns you exist so how would they be plotting against you? But it's ok that you think that sometimes. It's just apart of how your brain works. And it's better to sometimes be a skeptic than to trust things blindly.
(I even had to explain my PTSD because people think it's only something that you can get from war or whatever, but it's not like that).

Oh I see that makes sense. I'm sorry that this is all happening, it must be pretty tiring all the time. I would be scared, and then with the lack of sleep and lack of eating, that would be enough to make anyone feel horrible. Also for the shower heads, I'm sure that you have worked through this with your therapist, but what if you took a bath instead? Would that help? It's just something that popped into my mind. The swimsuit thing is a good idea. I wouldn't have thought of that. How long ago did this start for you?

I love non-toxic communities (like Voltra) I live for them lol. I'm happy that you found a good job!

SorrowTheMad

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@Totalanimefan: Rant away lol! I probably mostly agree with you on it so go for it lol. Sorry for the long replies too, by the way. I always read everything you respond with too :)

Yeah tithing is crazy to me. I don't know if you've ever seen it (or if you are interested) but George Carlin had a bit about tithing. He had a whole thing called Religion is BS, and it's part of that bit that he mentions it. "All powerful being, can create the universe and everything in it in seven days but just CAN'T seem to get the hang of money." I wouldn't recommend it if you'd get offended by such a thing, but I thought you might enjoy it. But yeah, if I was to ever go back to being christian I'd surely never give money to a church, I'd donate it to an orphanage or the women's shelter or something. Hell, even the Salvation Army. I never saw the good of giving it to a middleman, and not just giving it to a cause, because the less humans that have to touch the money, the less likely they'll be corrupted by it (since you mentioned mega-churches). I'm glad you and your family made it out ok though, even though you were struggling.

Totally get you on that. I grew up in a confrontational household though so I'm just used to standing my ground on most things. I've been trying to work on it too lol, which is why I try so hard to always be understanding. But I'm glad we worked it out :) And seriously good for you for giving that woman the what-for! Hope she went home and rethought some of her life. Lol.

Totalanimefan

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@SorrowTheMad: Yeah 2008-2010 was not kind to my family. We lost the house cause my parents got scammed by one of the big banks and the money problems from losing the job too were the beginning of the end for my parents being together (they aren't a good match anyway). I'm good with money, I don't know where I got it from cause I didn't get it from them lol. I think I have seen the clip that you are talking about. Once again, super into supporting a community that I'm apart of, but that means that I should be able to receive support when I need it too. It's not a one way street.
I mostly just give to charities like food banks. Esp in 2020. Lord knows they needed it.

If you ever want to feel a bit less jaded about it all, there was a church that I went too when I was in college, it was my high school choir's church. I sung there with some other people from my school choir that had finished high school. That church did a lot for the homeless and for children and they even had a harvest festival that was a lot of fun in the fall and the only thing you needed to be apart of it was a food donation. It was a First Baptist I believe. I also thought that it was interesting that you don't have baptized until you decide to. I know the Catholic way is so that if you were to die before you were old enough to chose on your own you won't go to hell, but I really liked the idea that it was your choice and I feel like that is how you would get people that actually care instead of just lip service and doing it because that is what was always done.

ANYWAY, I feel like I'm going to upset lurkers with my opinions so I think I will leave it at that. Are if you are a lurker, know that this came from growing up as Catholic and supporting it until I got older and felt like it was a corrupt cult. I'm not an outsider looking into the culture. If you believe in Jesus and like your church and you pray there is nothing wrong with that!

Ugh it's so exhausting though, and like you can't always be understanding or empathic when you are angry and the other person can't do that with you when they are angry. But it just feels impossible to tear down those walls, and you know some people don't even want to change, or what to try and see things differently. It's kinda sad if you think about it.

Totalanimefan

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@Ava: Yeah I wish that more people understood what mental health actually looks like instead of what they see in media. It's dumb.

Oh I see what you are saying about the police and having to call them all the time. I also wish that they were better trained in mental health. I feel like even though it's their job to deal with people, they are horrible at dealing with people. Have you had to deal with the police in LA?

I heard a theory that those voices are mean because of how negative our society is. There are tribal nations where people have schizophrenia but the voices are never mean, or negative. It's just a theory that I learned about in Psych class, but I thought that it was interesting.
Well like your brain can make other 'personalities' and have different voices. We all have a voice in our head, but it tends to just be one.

Oh that sucks. If you did have a bath when you move next, do you think that would help you, or would it still feel traumatic? I still think that swimsuit idea is a great idea. Sometimes I don't have the mental energy for a shower or a bath and then I tell myself just wash your body, or just do what you can even if you are sitting in the shower. It's amazing how chaining the 'rules' in your head can help you deal with things.

What makes it stressful? I wish it wasn't so stressful. When you are streaming you aren't like playing a character? You are just yourself while streaming?

Ruby

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@SorrowTheMad: nah, I’m not buyin it xD

Ruby

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Hi everyone :3 I really need to post more xD

Totalanimefan

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@Ruby: Hi there. We can chat here instead if you wish.

Ruby

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@Totalanimefan: aww thanks so much for the item total!!!

Totalanimefan

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@Ruby: No problem. ^^ I had some extra from back in the day lol

SorrowTheMad

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@Ruby: Rude. Buy my things! Lol.

@Totalanimefan: Yeah, that's how I see it too. I have a lady from the women's shelter in my BNI group, and the Salvation Army, and my mom runs a pretty cool foundation that helps kids who have lost siblings or parents. So yeah, I'd rather donate than have a middleman. But seriously I'm glad you all made it out mostly in one piece (sorry to hear about the not so great relationship your parents had though).

I very much appreciate Baptists' views on baptism only when you're old enough to choose it. I think all in all there's a lot to like about most religions or sects of religions. We're really not that different from one another. Sounds like a pretty great church, and I'd probably be interested in meeting some of the clergy there for that reason. I like kind people, regardless of the flag they bear.

Lol best to not upset the lurkers haha.

Yeah that is pretty sad. I've made a lot of headway on making changes in my life, and you can definitely ask Ruby, I've made quite a bit of improvement over the 5 years we've been together. :)

Totalanimefan

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@SorrowTheMad: That's cool. Is it a lot of work for your mom to run that?
Yeah like, why don't they all do that? It was a great church. I went there for about a year or so, but then I moved to England. I enjoyed singing there and going to service.
That's great! I'm always striving to improve myself too. I feel like therapy really helped me a lot with how to communicate with people better.

By Ghost
https://www.threads.net/@hannahfoll____
Discord: Totalanimefan
@me
I'm friendly and will chat with anyone!

Ruby

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@Totalanimefan: I really appreciate it!

Ruby

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@SorrowTheMad: you have no idea what we were talking about do you xD

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