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Really can't deal with weebs and anime anymore because of the aggressively rabid weeb I used to be friends with. I honestly feel like they've afflicted me with left over bad taste in my mouth. Like, this person was so aggressively weeaboo that she was ironically racist and more than once verbally degraded me for preferring Chinese over things Japanese or because I said that I don't like certain anime or tried calling their unintentional racism out. I can't. It's too bad because I used to be a casual fan of anime but now I can't watch it. The hairs on my arms and neck stand up like I've seen a ghost.
I understand that people makes a lot of bad choices especially when they are younger and I'm no exception. But today felt like my terrible decisions has come back to haunt me. A pandemic can really change my perspective about everything.
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I get that we're short staffed and what not, but at the same time if I am working more than you the store manager you don't really have a right to complain about how things are being done as long as things are getting done. You don't see me getting 4 day weekends almost every week only after working like 4 hours per day. Instead I get to work 10+ hour days and I just have to take it.
pls leave ur position if you can't do it. ID
pls leave ur position if you can't do it. ID
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I'm so tired of people misconstruing satanism with devil worship or people that perform stereotypical black masses. No, we do not kidnap, sacrifice, any of that in the name of Satan. No, we do not desecrate christian symbolism like how stereotypical black masses do. No, we do not worship the devil.
The principles that (at least the LaVeyan) Satanism operates by deliberately state to not harm other people unless it is necessary for your own safety, or because of issues with respect (like in someone disrespecting you in your house or bothering you in "open territory"). The Church of Satan is against drug abuse and would never promote anything that harms a person's body or breaks the law. PLEASE stop trying to relate satanism and those disgraces of communities, they are not at all the same, and they make all of us look bad.
The principles that (at least the LaVeyan) Satanism operates by deliberately state to not harm other people unless it is necessary for your own safety, or because of issues with respect (like in someone disrespecting you in your house or bothering you in "open territory"). The Church of Satan is against drug abuse and would never promote anything that harms a person's body or breaks the law. PLEASE stop trying to relate satanism and those disgraces of communities, they are not at all the same, and they make all of us look bad.
I don't even know who tf you are but you need to stop pretending you know everything about me and spouting bullshit. I really don't understand what you have against me and I'm not going to tip toe around you. If I bother you that much, just block me and move on with your pitiful existence. Your life must be very miserable if all you got going for you is to be like this to someone who has never said two words to you.
You know if you have something planned ahead don't dump it to someone else just because it didn't go your fucking way. I'm not your fucking assistant (-᷅_-᷄)
Sometimes I don't like some people forcing me to make friends when I told them I'm clearly not interested, not because I don't want to have friends. One, it's mostly due to having some trust issues whenever I meet a person and my mind starts to think if they're genuinely decent or not. Two, I didn't wanted to bother anyone or wasting their time and they'll might think I'm annoying, so I decided to think it's better to be alone than having lots of friends that I barely talk to.
I have determined that the fastest way to lose respect for someone is to add them on facebook and watch what shows up on your feed. :'^|
too bad I can't seem to find the guts to unfriend all these people I never even talk to because somehow I'm afraid that this will make me look like the dick in this situation instead of them, with all their awful BS posts and unfunny "jokes" that use people like me as the punchline. oof.
too bad I can't seem to find the guts to unfriend all these people I never even talk to because somehow I'm afraid that this will make me look like the dick in this situation instead of them, with all their awful BS posts and unfunny "jokes" that use people like me as the punchline. oof.
Covid19 is pissing me off.
School is annoying af.
I'm still on hold with the bank, it's been 40 minutes.
My credit is fucked, thanks mom.
I'm almost out of skincare and my skin isn't taking it's rations well.
I have reoccuring bills that need to be on a credit card so there's more reliability.
Everything is piking up and I'm trying to take extra shifts for it but I don't feel
100% comfortable doing so, especially since my partners at SB don't respect new protocols.
Life's a shitshow, but we learnin and adjustin.
School is annoying af.
I'm still on hold with the bank, it's been 40 minutes.
My credit is fucked, thanks mom.
I'm almost out of skincare and my skin isn't taking it's rations well.
I have reoccuring bills that need to be on a credit card so there's more reliability.
Everything is piking up and I'm trying to take extra shifts for it but I don't feel
100% comfortable doing so, especially since my partners at SB don't respect new protocols.
Life's a shitshow, but we learnin and adjustin.
Ping me for fast replies!
https://youtu.be/y4IF2WtkgtM
https://youtu.be/y4IF2WtkgtM
I can't do anything right and I can't catch a break. So why try anymore? What's the point of anything...I remember why I lived my life high now. I don't feel the pain...
(I hope this isn't considered necroing. i just didn't want to make a new topic for this)
- y'all ever kind of have a small crush and see them flirt with someone else and you realize it was so stupid to even entertain the thought. a bitter reminder that i exude no attracting energy and will probably be alone forever. i am not desirable. stop having random crushes. get through your thick skull that no one will ever want you :3c
- do i really want a bf or do i just want to be wanted? could i even handle a relationship? i can barely handle my own damn self. it seems so . like . a lot of responsibility. to have someone rely on you like that. what if i ignore them. its likely. i have 0 self confidence , and i am always mentally exhausted but i cant help thinking about it sometimes. i know i wouldn't be a good partner. so why do i torture myself
- do i really want a bf or do i just want to be wanted? could i even handle a relationship? i can barely handle my own damn self. it seems so . like . a lot of responsibility. to have someone rely on you like that. what if i ignore them. its likely. i have 0 self confidence , and i am always mentally exhausted but i cant help thinking about it sometimes. i know i wouldn't be a good partner. so why do i torture myself
Almost got taken or hurt by a creep.
He jumped in front of my bike while I was riding, and I almost went over the side of a bridge since I have no time to stop.
Started screaming at me that I "have problems" and "need to find guidance", and asking where I lived.
He kept jumping at me every time I tried to get away.
Yelling the whole time.
I'm not sure what would have happened if someone hadn't come.
If you're riding bikes, don't do it alone. And if you lose someone, go back and see what happened.
They could have gotten a flat, or worse, be taken by some creep.
Just be careful, ok? Keep yourselves safe.
Don't talk to anyone who asks you too many personal questions. There's always a reason for it, and not a good one.
He jumped in front of my bike while I was riding, and I almost went over the side of a bridge since I have no time to stop.
Started screaming at me that I "have problems" and "need to find guidance", and asking where I lived.
He kept jumping at me every time I tried to get away.
Yelling the whole time.
I'm not sure what would have happened if someone hadn't come.
If you're riding bikes, don't do it alone. And if you lose someone, go back and see what happened.
They could have gotten a flat, or worse, be taken by some creep.
Just be careful, ok? Keep yourselves safe.
Don't talk to anyone who asks you too many personal questions. There's always a reason for it, and not a good one.
Oh my love, I know you are my candyman
And oh my love, let us fly to bounty land~~
Közi (“Kouji.”)
He/him
I need help because my anxieties are crippling my ability to just exist, but to get help, i need to talk to my doctor who spikes me anxiety.
making phone calls spikes my anxiety. I've tried numerous times to get help. I've reached out to my doctor and I've managed to just shut down and sabotage those attempts and now it seems like she's reluctant to extend the same aid. I don't blame her, I tend to screw things up a lot.
No matter how many times I try to pick myself up by the boot straps and say "enough is enough" I can only get so far.
I can push through the anxiety to an extent, and then something comes up and I get so overwhelmed that I just shut down. My entire thought process shifts gears and starts moving in reverse. Suddenly everything seems hopeless, everything seems impossible, I don't know how to cope with the stress. I can start to do so good. I can make progress and it will seem like I'm finally doing things for myself, but all it takes is one extra inconvenience and I'm back at square one, but not after bulldozing all my progress so far.
I can't keep myself together. I can't keep my home together. The landlord was supposed to get someone to fix the shower and it's been almost a week, but he terrifies me too (for good reason. I've got some rocky financial history with him) and I dread to get into to contact with him to see what's going on. I feel disgusting. I want to shower so bad.
I want to get my home in order so I can cook and eat properly. I'm scared to enter my own fucking kitchen. That's how bad I've let it get. And what's frustrating is that I was able to stay on top of things before, but apparently that's all out the window now. My ability to keep things organized and clean has eroded over time. Sure I wasn't perfect to begin with, but it's gotten so. bad. Now I feel like I'm living in a fucking biohazard and I'm disgusted and paranoid to be in my own home.
I can't do this on my own anymore, but I dread to let others see how I'm living.
I keep thinking, "if I can at least get this much done, then it won't be so bad to get through the rest". But I'm scared just to step outside my own fucking apartment. I'm scared of my neighbors seeing me. No particular reason, just the thought of others knowing I exist for some reason makes it hard for me to function. Sometimes I try to haul out trash bags at three in the morning when I think it's less likely anyone will see me, but I have so much and our garbage bins can only carry so much trash. I still have stuff left over and I have to wait until I can do it again.
God I need to do something about this. I've lost control of my life. Though to be fair, I've never had control of it. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't want to be here anymore, but I'm scared of death.
>:( It should be illegal to allow people's week-to-week schedules to back up against each other in such a way that they could end up working as much as 10+ days in a row with only a single day off before starting another work week. There are policies in place preventing people from having two back-to-back shifts with no time to sleep in between; you'd think it wouldn't be that much harder to check how their schedules interact from one work week to the next and move days around accordingly. And if it's that hard to manage, why don't we just have regular schedules in the first place? Always give us the same days on and off, that way giving someone their PTO or something doesn't affect everybody else's schedule. There are people who'd be happy to float around and take whatever shifts are available. But meh, what do I know? I'm not a manager; I'm sure everything is "easier said than done"... but everywhere that isn't retail seems to be able to handle schedules more efficiently than this. Bah.
I hate how everything is on hold for 2-3 days because of Christmas. One thing after another is piling up on me and my whole life is hanging in the balance, and all these kind-of-a-big-deal things are just... paused. Because of a stupid holiday. A holiday that's been dragging out for months now, and the juxtaposition of cheery Christmas music with my life crashing down around me is not helping one bit. Every year I think I hate Christmas just a little bit more. As if I need another burning reminder of how insignificant and inconsequential I am...
So for now here I am, stuck in Christmas twilight, waiting to find out just how badly I'll be screwed over this time... you know... when the rest of the world gets back from enjoying their holiday.
I go around telling people "Whatever happens, I'll get through this :^)" and that seems to be enough for them, but you know, it gets really tiring after saying the same shit for decades while getting ignored and lied to and jerked around again and again and again because nobody cares enough to do their part. The only reason that statement is even true is because what is my other option? Death? Of course I'll "get through it"; if I'm still technically alive then I've technically made it through. That doesn't mean it's OK. That doesn't mean it will ever be OK.
I'm so tired of just hanging on the edge, waiting for things to fall. Then falling, then catching on another edge and having to wait again. But nobody's gonna reach down and pull me up, are they? And especially not during The Holidays; what a downer that would be!
tl;dr: I'm just a thing nobody feels like dealing with and my life continues to get worse while everybody's Christmas cheer just rubs salt in the wounds.
So for now here I am, stuck in Christmas twilight, waiting to find out just how badly I'll be screwed over this time... you know... when the rest of the world gets back from enjoying their holiday.
I go around telling people "Whatever happens, I'll get through this :^)" and that seems to be enough for them, but you know, it gets really tiring after saying the same shit for decades while getting ignored and lied to and jerked around again and again and again because nobody cares enough to do their part. The only reason that statement is even true is because what is my other option? Death? Of course I'll "get through it"; if I'm still technically alive then I've technically made it through. That doesn't mean it's OK. That doesn't mean it will ever be OK.
I'm so tired of just hanging on the edge, waiting for things to fall. Then falling, then catching on another edge and having to wait again. But nobody's gonna reach down and pull me up, are they? And especially not during The Holidays; what a downer that would be!
tl;dr: I'm just a thing nobody feels like dealing with and my life continues to get worse while everybody's Christmas cheer just rubs salt in the wounds.
I hate the holidays. So much. I wouldn't have hated it so much if I wasn't constantly working at a grocery store where they play Christmas music. People come in wanting to return things and just generally being very mean to me for no reason. Retail is bad enough, but then you add on the pressure of a lot of people coming through and buying presents and all that repeating Christmas music, it just really gets on my nerves very very quickly.
Male/20/gay/sad. :(
I usually only check this site like once or twice a day so it might take me a bit to respond.
I usually only check this site like once or twice a day so it might take me a bit to respond.
I shoulda known! Right after my previous rant, I got a sudden and suspiciously high amount of good luck. My mounting problems were, if not outright resolved, at least substantially eased to the point of being manageable. The biggest problem being that my move might have been canceled, but turned out it wasn't! ...But now, right when I let my guard down enough to dare to be happy again, once again, I get blindsided by crappy news and now my move might--again--actually be canceled. Because of someone else's screwup, again. I'm so sick of all these issues that aren't even my fault just piling on because nobody else can be assed to do things right in my life. And I'm so sick of it always happening right when I start thinking maybe I can trust things to work out. How stupid of me. Of course nothing will ever get better; nothing ever really changes.
There's still a small chance for it to be worked out, but I know better than to hold my breath for it this time. As I should have known the last time, and the time before that, and the time before that, and the time before that...
There's still a small chance for it to be worked out, but I know better than to hold my breath for it this time. As I should have known the last time, and the time before that, and the time before that, and the time before that...
ALWAYS PING ME
My rant: 2020. It sucks and I'm so glad it's over. I just really really hope that with the new year everything will once more become normal (and not this "new normal" BS) again. I know it's a fantasy and that this chaos and crap is likely to continue but still... And politicians/politics. I'm so horribly sick of these egocentric manipulative asses who bill themselves as working in our best interests when it's so obviously Not the case...
┤▒├ Hangout with me! ┤▒├
Was listening to a program on NPR this morning, and the topic was the stimulus check recently approved/dispersed here in the U.S. Of course when the floor was open for questions/points of discussion, someone said, "My son, who's a working college student, will likely receive the stimulus check very soon, and will likely put the funds toward his student loans. I'm just concerned, is that really what this stimulus was meant for? And since he's working, does he really need it? I don't think this stimulus package was very well thought out."
...
It's none of your effing business what people do with THEIR money. And who are YOU to say that they don't need the extra money? Because they're working??? Lemme tell ya, just because you're so lucky to have a job in these times doesn't mean you get to live comfortably. Having a job doesn't mean you don't have debt in some form. Car payments? Mortgage? Credit cards? Heck, you may have only RECENTLY become employed after being out of a job for who knows how long, so now you have to play catch-up with your finances.
People who try to tell others what to do with their money really piss me off. I'd considered making a thread about this topic, but thought the better of it and decided to use this space instead.
...
It's none of your effing business what people do with THEIR money. And who are YOU to say that they don't need the extra money? Because they're working??? Lemme tell ya, just because you're so lucky to have a job in these times doesn't mean you get to live comfortably. Having a job doesn't mean you don't have debt in some form. Car payments? Mortgage? Credit cards? Heck, you may have only RECENTLY become employed after being out of a job for who knows how long, so now you have to play catch-up with your finances.
People who try to tell others what to do with their money really piss me off. I'd considered making a thread about this topic, but thought the better of it and decided to use this space instead.
Goodbye, Voltra.
Feel free to add me on Discord: aisu9811
Feel free to add me on Discord: aisu9811
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Having you as a Voltie would be awesome.