Mellonin's posts

Well, I drank last night. So yeah, that was a failure. I made it to 4 days this time. Yay?

Back to day 1, I suppose.

@Totalanimefan: This isn't my first rodeo, but this time I refuse to think of relapsing as 'okay'. I even tossed about 20 $$ worth of alcohol down the drain this time, instead of telling my father to simply hide it. It's like I'm saying to myself "It's okay if you fail. Here's a backup supply of alcohol for when it happens."

I've decided on a bit of a mantra - Drinking is Failing, and You are not a Failure. It seems to be helping, at least a little bit.

Thank you all for your encouraging words.

I'm on day 3 right now, and the hot flashes and just general feeling of unwellness has already set in. I'm really hoping I don't get the tremors or hallucinations this time, especially since I'm at home trying to do this with only my father for support - I was in a hospital last time, being carefully monitored because of how bad some of my reactions were.

Unfortunately, my entire circle of 'friends' can be classed more a drinking buddies, so that's a support group that isn't really available to me. They would probably just make fun of me, to be honest. It's what they would do every time I tried to go out and drink only soda, so I can only imagine their response to me actually trying to quit :(

@Shark: I wish it was that easy. I've tried to quit, so I know what's coming in my immediate future. I'm going to get sick, I might hallucinate. I'm definitely going to be irritable and my appetite is going to be crap. I wasn't just a social drinker - we are talking about black out drunk, no memories of the night, at least every other night. This is NOT going to be fun.

@nomnomwoobat: The problem I find, is that most support groups tend to be religiously based, and I am most definitely atheist, so I quickly get turned off by the whole 'put your recovery in gods hands' type of spiel they are normally throwing my way. Even when they aren't focused on one particular religion, they all seem to be very . . . spiritual? Always talking about a 'higher power' - whether that is a god-like being or something else that you can put all your faith in.

But thank you so much for your words of encouragement!

Okay, serious talk time.

I have some serious issues with alcohol, and I am finally making a serious attempt to quit.

I'm only on day 2, and I'm already seriously struggling.

Not sure why I'm writing about it on here ... maybe looking for some encouragement? Finally saying it to somebody else?

If anybody has any ideas of encouragement for me, it would be appreciated, though.

Welcome to Voltra! I miss the days of the original Gaia, before it got over crowded and started focusing on making RL money for it's creators, instead of being a cool place to hang out and play games.

Definitely the goggles!

8:40 PM for me!

Welcome to the madhouse!

Oh wow, I miss that game! With so many other games getting remakes, I keep hoping they'll at least port some of the Zelda games over to PC, like they did for Chrono Trigger and Chrono Cross.

Welcome!

I know how you feel - I'm often wary of revealing just how old I am, for fear of looking like a creeper or something. Most of the people I've spoken to on these sorts of sites are so much younger than me!

@Totalanimefan: The fact that you knew somebody in the community probably had a lot to do with the welcome that you received. Me, as an outsider, just randomly showing up and insinuating myself into their community, without a welcome or invitation? I'm not so sure I would be as welcome as you were!

@Totalanimefan: I would definitely want to be fluent enough to ask permission before I tried to insinuate myself into a meeting or community event, since I am NOT part of the deaf community, just an outsider trying to learn more.