@totalanimefan: Thanks for your well wishes to him ^^ <3
I actually stopped taking amitriptyline abruptly without any consultation~ ^^;

@totalanimefan: This year, I stopped taking amitriptyline after roughly 5 or 6?? months of use. In 2019, I took it for 4 or 5?? months before then once again abruptly stopped taking it; I was okay then & I think now…? I do still have terrible stomach indigestion/heartburn which I’m pretty sure (I hope) is something to be easily fixed (with exercise & fresh air/eating better & not too fast + drinking water more). I hope it’s not because of withdrawal or vaccine effects. 🙏 I am thinking about talking more about medication to my therapist again & taking maybe an SSRI or something; he has suggested before I could talk to my neurologist again or a /new/ psychiatrist (it has to be a new psychiatrist who actually respects me as an adult individual & one I can trust & is more empathic and understanding; I won’t expand why because bad memories & I’m a bit hesitant that my psychiatrist will think I’m psychotic if they knew all the meltdowns I had and okay 😢) specialising in the body. I trust my current therapist & neurologist though. I am open to taking a lesser medication than amitriptyline (I mean, I do like it & it does help me sleep & I know it gives me numb effects noticeably when my body remembers it after forgetting). I know my amnesia and headaches is from too much stress, and I know it’s very common thing and I hear about it in songs too like Numb by Linkin Park which I hear in a new light now. I do think I need some kind of new medication for my stress/anxiety/depression. I might mention to my neurologist that I am seeking medication advice specifically about my ocd/anxiety/depression/and expand more about my life situation at some point, before seeking a new psychiatrist; as I have seen my neurologist a few times now & got along well with him.

@totalanimefan: Oh okay~ I got my second vaccine dose today btw. It’s good you’re okay now from the doses :) Yeah I’m thinking of asking my psychiatrist (I now made appointment) about what meds could work for ocd that is not a tricyclic antidepressant like amitriptyline. My mum doesn’t think medication would be good for me, but I think it would help reduce angry outbursts & make me calmer/level-headed. She was more concerned about amitriptyline effects though.

@totalanimefan: Thankyou! <3 I’ll try to drink enough water.

Yeah, I have a few medications in mind to take so I’ll say them to psychiatrist when I see him.

Life update: If all goes well with the application process, sometime in the future, I may be able to get work at a disability supported workplace & go to another job training program. I’m scared but also hopeful about how vastly my life will change if that happens. I just hope so much that I can get through completing the application & it gets approved. 🤞

@totalanimefan: Hi. :) I didn’t end up going to a disability supported workplace, even though I prepared very thoroughly with application of the general disability insurance scheme within the year we chat here about it in 2021, talking to my therapist, and contacting people of various providers. I also imagined me at the workplace with watching videos of potential providers, an upbeat dance atmospheric advertising of how opportunistic the workplace was. I was imagining myself talking to the people within there, and participating in activities like packaging. I was progressing in chatting to a provider, but then she stopped replying to me. :/ I was saying I didn’t want any suggested paths that led to more study, in a carefully crafted introducing of myself. She probably thought I was strange, and hurting quietly within my polite intro, so she is just leaving me alone.

I don’t take any medication.

I think I was okay after the second shot, and I got a booster shot in 2022.