Hi all,
This is a serious topic that has been giving me a lot of anxiety lately. I just turned 30 this summer, and my husband is 35. We have never wanted kids. I feel like now that I'm 30 I only have a little bit of time to decide. Like I always thought the decision was made, and I'm pretty sure I still feel that way, but I'm worried that when I grow old, (or even just reach like 40) that I might have regrets that I didn't have a kid. I've never had that biological drive to have a baby, but I heard stories a lot about people who regretted it later in life. I don't want that for myself.
When I went to FL lots of my friends and cousins had babies/young kids and they seemed happy, of course being around kids that much I don't hate them, but they are just a lot of work all the time. I don't have the energy nor the drive to be a parent.
When I have all this anxious energy about it, I just tell myself. "It's ok, you don't have to have them." And it makes me feel more calm. Thinking the other way raises my anxieties.
I know this is a subject for a therapist but I don't have one at the moment and it's just causing me a lot of struggle. Sometimes I wish that I was more 'normal' and wanted my own kid.
I did have a chat with my husband about it. And he's on the fence. Doesn't really want one, but if we did decide to have one, he would want to adopt. I feel like if I did want a kid, I would want it to be my own? But I'm not sure, and we could always just adopt for the 2nd kid, but then what if I didn't love them the same? Ok, can you see where my anxious thoughts are getting the best of me?