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Currently, I have zero motivation when I am at home. I just zone out and then suddenly it has been twelve hours and it is time for bed. There is so much paperwork to do and I am looking back at all of my incomplete deadlines.
This has gotten to the point where I am having a discussion with my supervisor tomorrow that I am super anxious and worried about. I have talked to SOOOO many people about my meeting tomorrow and they mention that I need to go in, be honest, take the constructive criticism, and then work to do so much better than I am right now.
My initial fear when this meeting was scheduled is that I was going to get told that I will not be re-hired for the 2020-21 school year in the district. The meeting is more about looking at the struggles I have had in the areas of legally binding deadlines, my performance during my two informal observations and my most recent formal one, and what I can plan to do going forward to make it so that they CAN be confident in keeping me.
It is sad to see that I, someone who was always on top of her work, never missed a deadline, was a major overachiever and busy bee, have come to the point where my higher-ups are sitting me down to plead that I work harder because they don't want to lose me. The secondary reason is that they have invested so much time and money in me as a teacher.
I have three outstanding deadlines and two other documents I need to update and turn in. My mind is spinning. My anxiety is otherworldly. What do I do to get myself back on track? How can I crawl out of this slump that is most likely caused because of burn out? I am a full-time teacher, I have to balance it. I cannot put the breaks on my job because I have to go in my 5 days, 40 hours a week.
Sorry for the long rant. I am spiraling. I might have to step away from here for a week or so until I am caught up on my work.
This has gotten to the point where I am having a discussion with my supervisor tomorrow that I am super anxious and worried about. I have talked to SOOOO many people about my meeting tomorrow and they mention that I need to go in, be honest, take the constructive criticism, and then work to do so much better than I am right now.
My initial fear when this meeting was scheduled is that I was going to get told that I will not be re-hired for the 2020-21 school year in the district. The meeting is more about looking at the struggles I have had in the areas of legally binding deadlines, my performance during my two informal observations and my most recent formal one, and what I can plan to do going forward to make it so that they CAN be confident in keeping me.
It is sad to see that I, someone who was always on top of her work, never missed a deadline, was a major overachiever and busy bee, have come to the point where my higher-ups are sitting me down to plead that I work harder because they don't want to lose me. The secondary reason is that they have invested so much time and money in me as a teacher.
I have three outstanding deadlines and two other documents I need to update and turn in. My mind is spinning. My anxiety is otherworldly. What do I do to get myself back on track? How can I crawl out of this slump that is most likely caused because of burn out? I am a full-time teacher, I have to balance it. I cannot put the breaks on my job because I have to go in my 5 days, 40 hours a week.
Sorry for the long rant. I am spiraling. I might have to step away from here for a week or so until I am caught up on my work.
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Tumbleweed
