If you cannot afford birth control then you shouldn't have sex

vengeance

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Yeh well I just heard to most stupid thing on the radio. So basicly back in the days birth control was paid for by your health insurance in my country. Not anymore. So people want it back. Abortion is paid for by our health insurance. The guy they where talking to said getting rid of refunding abortions leads to serious problems. Lot's of unwanted kids will be born. The host then asked but doesn't abortion also comes from not having acces to birth control. And then he said if you cannot afford birth control then you shouldn't have sex.

Bonnie

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@vengeance: this is absolutely a touchy subject for America as well but it’s absolutely ridiculous for someone to say something.

There are a lot of factors involved in this situation and I feel like people are thinking on it in terms of black and white and I’m hesitating in saying it’s a gray area. There’s nothing unethical/immoral about having 100% consensual sex. Period. So the fact that we are attempting to police it is ridiculous.

Birth control at its core is a form of protection and should be used as a weapon for policing, controlling, religious grandstanding, etc. it’s sickening that it is used for that.

We should be teaching about sex and all sexual related topics: importance of consent, laws and regulations regarding sex (to prevent date rape cases where one of the parties involved is still a minor), and all forms of protection (ABSTINENCE IS A FORM OF PROTECTION IN MY MIND, no different from condoms).

This is just how I feel about it.

bloop

milkshake

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》::: ✿･`.*
I was about to go off on you til i read the post lol
Thats insane and stupid. Peoples own bodies are THEIR CHOICES
*.`･✿ ::: 《

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Eruca

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Yeah. So poor people can't afford to have sex, and so they won't have offspring to pass on their poor gene and then we'll have fewer poor people.
Capitalism is working great.

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Lucifera

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Honestly, everyone is entitled to a healthy sex life. It's not just reproduction but there are many benefits to just having the release of orgasm. (sorry if that's not Pg-13 for the site y'all. xD )

It's incredibly annoying that this is an issue. I technically can afford birth control since it's covered in CA I believe. But I honestly can't take it, I've had horrid reactions to it and unfortunately, I've had to steer clear. But honestly, even if you can't afford birth control, you deserve to have that in your life.

I honestly feel it's a kind of modern sex-shaming and any time someone says something like to me, I pretend I couldn't understand what they mean until they feel stupid. :viohappy:

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faerie

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Birth control (any and all options) should be free.
there should be no extra tax on menstrual products
Poor people, are human, and I believe the ability to have loving, meaningful, even sexual relationships, is a human right for any adult.
Abortion is a healthcare right, it must not be denied.

also please tell men that women can't control their periods like holding in their pee

late stage capitalism and folks who failed health class *internal screaming*

Aonani

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@vengeance: I'll play the devil's advocate on this one.

Sex has two conclusions. Either you get pregnant or you don't.
Typically if you are in a situation where you cannot afford birth control, you are not in a place in your life where you are financially stable enough to have a child and provide for one. Taking the risk of a possible unwanted pregnancy and other complications that come with sex just because you want to get off is selfish and ignorant.

I get it, no one wants to be told what to do and sex is nothing to be demonized between two consenting individuals but there is literally no other outcomes with sex.

Abstinence or engaging in sexual acts that do not include penetration until you can afford birth control or other contraceptives should not be demonized like it has been. Being able to plan your life, being able to do these things shows that you are mature enough emotionally, physically and financially- which affords people to be more successful down the road.

Excluding the more extreme cases like incest/rape, this would dramatically reduce the need for abortions, social services etc.

Miika

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I agree with Aonani.
If you don't want to have a baby, don't have unprotected sex. Mutual masturbation or dry humping works just fine.

If people can't even shell out 10$ for a pack of condoms or birth control pills, how on earth are they gonna be able to afford all the stuff a baby needs?
I'm not saying poor people shouldn't have kids, that's not at all what I'm saying. Although... If you are so poor you can't take proper basic care of the child, you are probably not in a position where it would benefit anyone if you had one.

People overrate sex. Sex consists of two things, intimacy and orgasms.
Lots of people think they need the orgasmic part of sex to obtain intimacy. It could just as easily be obtained by spooning and gently stroking each other's bodies.
There's nothing wrong with spooning your partner naked and then resolving to hand jobs if one or both parties feel like they need the orgasm on top of that.

If people can't afford the consequences of penetrative unprotected sex, they shouldn't have it. There are other ways to get orgasms and intimacy.

I've always wanted to lift a large quadraped over my head

Count Trashula

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Big, big, big things to note here: Children aren't a "consequence". Sex isn't something that needs to be shamed, punished, or "paid for" with unwanted outcomes. The way we talk about these things absolutely does have an effect on the way they are viewed and treated in society.

Yes, if you know that you completely lack access to both birth control and abortion services and you know that you are not ready or able to undergo pregnancy, it may be unwise to risk PIV sex.
Yes, even if you have access to birth control but the latter part of that statement still applies, PIV sex can still be risky, because birth control is not always 100% effective.

However, sex is a natural and healthy part of adult life and it serves many more functions than just reproduction. Birth control, abortion services, prenatal care, adoption services, and everything else related to reproductive health should be made accessible, just like any other normal part of healthcare. Same with comprehensive sex education.

In most cases, cheap or free birth control options do exist. Reproductive health clinics often have condoms available without cost, and they can be found for very little cost anywhere from gas stations to grocery stores. But they are not completely without risk of failure.

So being able to afford birth control isn't the only, or even the biggest, thing to take into consideration when making the decision to have sex. And I'm certainly not saying that people shouldn't be encouraged to consider the possibilities and weigh the risks; they absolutely should. But just telling someone "if you can't afford birth control, don't have sex" is reductive at best, and at worst, it perpetuates the attitude that "sex without planning for pregnancy should be punished".

In conclusion: Yes, by all means, consider your options and take precautions! But it's equally important for people to remember that no matter what they decide or what precautions they take, sometimes shit happens. There should not be shame and stigma attached to people wanting to have sex without wanting to get pregnant, and there should always be options available. Reducing the issue down to "just don't have sex then" increases the risks and number of issues from all angles due to lack of resources, options, support, and information.

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Aonani

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@Count Trashula:

I just want to start off that I'd like to comment on some of the things you mentioned and in no way am I trying to be offensive or overly critical. I just want to point out a different perspective and pick your brain on what your thoughts are on it.

A consequence is result or effect of an action or condition, although it may have a negative connotation in your eyes a child is a "consequence" of penetrative sex.

You mentioned no one should be shamed or punished/paid for with this unwanted outcome - Yet two consenting individuals (with the exception of rape/incest cases) would have had to make a conscious choice to engage in an activity that has a child as a potential outcome. Even if they are acting responsibly with contraceptives a child is still a possibility and has to be taken into consideration. This is why historically sex has been viewed in a negative light in order to curb unwanted pregnancies and the responsibility that comes with it. Sex can be fun and it does have great effects for mental health, but it is a serious action between two people that can have devastating effects financially, emotionally and physically.

Dismissing criticism as "shaming" only enables a person's ability to displace accountability- I mean this only in the sense that when you desensitize people to an actions importance they are likely blame others rather than correcting the action that lead to the result.

I agree with comprehensive sexual education- more information allows a person to make an informed decision which will likely reduce the cases of unwanted pregnancies, raise awareness on sexual health etc.

As for birth control/ prenatal care- No one is responsible or can make medical decisions for another person legally unless they are in guardian situations (child/parent etc.) and so no one should be responsible for another person's contraceptives/prenatal care. The responsibility always falls on the two individuals who have made the decision and agreement to engage in a sexual relationship. Now if there are other people that would like to be generous and help they are more than welcome to, but it shouldn't be demanded or assumed that is should be provided for free.

So yes, sex without planning for pregnancy should be "punished" and criticized because two people made a conscious decision to selfishly seek sexual gratification with a sexual act that guarantees a possibility of a child.

As for abortion - this is probably a very sensitive topic that is not appropriate in this forum/site.

For your conclusion - again, sexual pleasure is nothing to be ashamed about- sexual acts between consenting adults also nothing to be ashamed about.

performing a sexual act that will have an outcome of a child as a possibility when you know you are unable to do it safely, unable to accept or care for a child or make a tough decision regarding whether or not you would put that child up for adoption is something to be ashamed about.

Chatterbox

skettiyeti

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Ah, yeah that is a common thing people say when they are against abortion, they'll say abstinence is the best birth control, which personally I believe to be very ignorant. Sex will happen anyway - it's better to teach safe sex practices and provide birth control.