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Forums Serious Talk does anyone else feel like there's no word to really describe ur situations

Voltie — She/Her Posted 5 years ago ( 2019/02/15 14:47:33 )

TW; Abuse/Sexual assault

I'm not going to go into details, but since I'm mentioning those things, I added a TW in case anyone wants to turn away from this.

So I've had issues with emotional/mental "abuse" in my life, both from relationships and family, and I've also had some incidents with "sexual assault" in my life. However, I feel like abuse and sexual assault are too... severe to use for my situations. I sometimes even wonder if what happened was abuse/assault. I'm just really unsure of what to call them because I feel like they weren't as severe as other people's situations, and I wonder if I'm making a joke out of their situations by calling mine abuse/sexual assault?

i mean, does anyone else feel like this? or feel like they're overreacting to this stuff? like, i was in an "abusive" relationship online for 2 months and one irl for 6 months and i feel like maybe i'm overreacting and that they weren't even that bad/ like why should they still affect me?

idk, this is rambling but yeah. just kinda trying to see if this is normal.
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Donator Posted 5 years ago ( 2019/02/15 15:14:39 )

I heard somewhere once that one's mind trying to convince them that what was bad is not as bad as it was is a marker such a relationship. Remember, drowned in seven inches of water is as dead as drowned in seven feet. Others having it worse does not mean you must wave off what you endured. Abuse is abuse, assault is assault. Does not matter if yours involved a nerf gun and theirs a rifle, if it happened, it happened and that is the name for it.

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Donator Posted 5 years ago ( 2019/02/16 00:13:09 )
@gay space trash: I think it's totally normal!

I felt like assault was too harsh, but I knew what happened was wrong.

My mom wanted to go to their moms and tell them what happened. I told her no and that it wasn't that bad and besides, I still had to go to school with these guys...Maybe I was being too dramatic.

I kept justifying things by saying "at least it wasn't XYZ.." " Other people have it worse.." " These are my friends! They were just playing..."

But the fact is- No matter how much I could justify the situation- wrong is wrong and it affected me then and it still affects me now in the fact that even 13 years later, I still can't bring myself to wear a bikini. I'm married. I'm over it. I don't even think about it.. until it's time to swim.

I've seen this picture floating around and I think it really helps! Your situation may not seem as bad as someone else's, but it's still not okay. It's still not right.


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Please ping! I get distracted easily.

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