So like I'm talking about gender and sexuality as it comes up in roleplay, such as people not playing their own gender/sexuality, etc. Nothing explicit, but thought I should warn you in case it squicks you out. I'm not trying to start a fight, just looking for another opinion. Anyway --
I want to get back into roleplaying, so I went to a roleplay site and everything was going well until I started to fill out my preferences. There's a section where you can choose what genders you'd like to play and which genders you'd like your partner to play. Which is fine and understandable, however.
They listed "futanari" as a gender, which just squicked me because I've usually seen it used in porn as a kind of tasteless way of exploiting transwomen. I googled it to see if I should actually be offended, and the "similar searches" offered by Wikipedia were outdated words for transgender/transexual people that are now considered somewhat offensive, so it's kinda like, okay yeah, I think I'm okay to feel this way?
Am I being a weenie or does it make sense that it squicks me? The fact that it's listed like that (and they also listed "transgender" as a play preference, which was weird to me - I am transgender, if you haven't picked up on that) is enough to make me reconsider using the site at all. It has a very "straight/cis people playing at being gay/trans because they're into it" vibe. I mean, I know roleplay and fanfic is full of that sort of thing (I think a lot of it has to do with people figuring out their own gender/sexuality, and it isn't always a fetish thing), but it just made me feel . . . gross?
Anyway let me know what you think. Shout out to any mod who moves or deletes this; not sure if it's okay to talk about in broad terms like this.
Peace.
Forums Serious Talk Am I being a weenie? [not sure if adult content? talking about gender stuff]
Why is the site using an outdated term that is now considered derogatory? That is concerning, I think, and well worth not wishing to stay on.
I agree with crane-- its kinda off putting for a website to be doing that these days.....
I don't think I've even heard of that word. But if it's using those kinds of terms, I'd just not use the site myself.
Yeah no, that's a shitty way of referring to it. It's perfectly fine to be turned away from the site for it's usage of the word.
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True, futa means they have both sexual organs. It sucks how often it’s used in reference to hentai though..
Yeah, it depends on what gender they were raised as too.. I believe their gender is whatever gender they are happy/comfortable as.
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Kent: Not seeing the problem with using futa as a term in regards to hentai.
It's being used as a category term so people can find their fetish stuff.
@longbones: But yeah, like Nigel said. Technically different, but there probably are people on there using it improperly.
And if you wanted to avoid cybering, I'd take the 'futa' tag as a red flag.
I can see it going either way whether it's bad or benign. Probably on a case by case of people using it.
It's being used as a category term so people can find their fetish stuff.
@longbones: But yeah, like Nigel said. Technically different, but there probably are people on there using it improperly.
And if you wanted to avoid cybering, I'd take the 'futa' tag as a red flag.
I can see it going either way whether it's bad or benign. Probably on a case by case of people using it.
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I'd also consider if it makes sense for a possibly offensive term to be used in the context of the roleplay itself. Perhaps the people who made the roleplay are not out to offend but the characters in their world can still hold prejudices and the world needs to be set up accordingly. You could even set it up so that your character starts a campaign to make their society more politically correct, fix things from the inside.
@longbones: After reading through what is here, I feel I should point on little thing out.
If you don't like having Futa listed, you shouldn't just abandon ship. Instead express to the owners/staff of the site as to why it is an issue for you, and perhaps find out what they were meaning behind it.
If they meant that for trans, then they're idiots, plain and simple. As Nigel said, Futa and trans are two completely different things. So yeah, if that's supposed to be for trans, they're idiots. If they put that instead of putting 'hermaphrodite' because a lot of people will know futa/futanari instead of hermaphrodite, then that actually makes sense.
Just... my two cents.
(Really though, don't stay somewhere you've issues with the core of. That just spells problems in the future.
And the wiki seriously needs an update from the sounds of it. > <)
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Rallaa:
Kent: Not seeing the problem with using futa as a term in regards to hentai.
It's being used as a category term so people can find their fetish stuff.
Kent: Not seeing the problem with using futa as a term in regards to hentai.
It's being used as a category term so people can find their fetish stuff.
It’s not exactly a problem, I just think that Westerners correlate it with hentai too much when I imagine it’s a word used for other things too? Thus it really is mostly a sexual term in America.
Ash 8/7/19 
I haven't heard that word, but if it's on the site, it seems like maybe they were trying to be inclusive and didn't realize the meaning has changed (I think that's what you're saying)? You could just send them a message and update them on the use. They may genuinely not know. I mean, I consider myself trans/nonbinary and I never heard it before so...maybe it's not that common? Or maybe it's just me. I dunno.
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Having you as a Voltie would be awesome.