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Forums The Undercurrent Synth’s journal

Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 02:22:14 )
I don’t have time!!! Ahhhhh

That’s okay
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 02:33:06 )
You know and then I think about tumblr for real and all the ads and suggested posts now and …… idk. On one hand i miss it and on the other it’s such a mess now.
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 05:54:28 )
One more hour!!! I’m tired lmao!!

And crow wants me to start doing my readings at night 😩 I’m so tired but he’s demanding of me. Since I don’t do them in the morning. Ahhhh
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 06:37:28 )
My need to record everything is kind of annoying. I’d like to write things down so I can reference them later. But there’s not a great way to do that right now. And it’s not like I do reference anything I write anyway.

Maybe I should just focus on doing and not worry about recording right now, since it’s just getting in the way
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 06:37:48 )
Meant to respond to like four conversations here today but I didn’t because I’m bad and tired oh well
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 06:58:20 )
Idk man. I’m a very concrete person and I like KNOWING things and it’s hard to ….. figure out isn’t the right word. Accept? Accept some of the things that come my way spiritually.
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 06:58:46 )
I reckon faith is required for anything like that but it’s hard. Hard to not just be like damn I’m crazy. Or something.
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 06:59:18 )
Dunno. Not sure how to differentiate between me and the other. Or if there is a difference. If it’s all what it is
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 06:59:32 )
I know I sound crazy. Work with me here lmao
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 22:50:53 )
Ohhhhhh made it to work just under an hour late. Probably shouldn’t be here but it is what it is. Need to get my tonsils out before they ducking choke me to death
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 22:51:49 )
That old epipen actually expired a year ago so I guess if I have an allergy attack I’ll just die lmao

Why the fuck!!!!! Are companies allowed to wait six months to give you insurance!!!
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/14 22:52:22 )
“Give” like you still have to pay for it out of your paycheck. Bullshit

Maybe I shoulda stayed home. Whatever. I hate missing work. And I hate working lmao
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/15 00:06:03 )
Ohhhh I’m exhausted but I’m glad I came to work I guess. I do prefer the normalcy. And it’s good to be making money right now.
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/15 00:07:11 )
I hope I don’t have another allergy attack like a few years ago

Maybe it’s best I likely won’t be able to go do this school thing in the summer because it’s in the valley and last time I went there in the summer I ended up in the er because I couldn’t breathe
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/15 00:08:32 )
Never did get that allergy test. Maybe I’ll see if they can do it or prescribe me another epipen to take with me. Maybe. Or maybe not! Maybe I’ll just not go to the doctor again until I have insurance! Idk!

Nah I really need to at least do my T labs I’d nothing else. I’m worried my levels are high and maybe that’s part of why I feel so gross
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/15 00:10:05 )
Oh idk what’s real and what’s not. Looking over that weirdness from last night. Idk.

Idk what I should do. I’m trying to be more present and have more agency instead of relying on like…. Whatever bullshit I convince myself I’m listening to or reading or whatever.

I’m really tired. Being an adult is hard. Being a human is hard.
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/15 00:10:37 )
My dad still doesn’t really believe in emotional abuse but at least he’s not trying to convince me to be friendly with my mother anymore. Evil bitch
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/15 00:11:26 )
It’ll be nice to get on the road and get away from all this. I love my dad and still want a relationship with him but we shouldn’t be living together lmao.
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/15 00:12:19 )
Man I do miss the glory days of having multiple roleplays on solia though.

Ahh I miss role playing but I don’t have time for it! I should be writing in general too but I’m so tired. Idk might get myself a new notebook and do that midwife story.
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Donator — he/him Posted 2 years ago ( 2022/04/15 00:12:43 )
Miss writing by hand just for the sake of writing too. My handwritings gotten worse since I stopped writing on paper lol
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ping me for best results

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