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Forums Serious Talk My dad thinks he get's to dictate everything regarding my mom working

Donator Posted 4 years ago ( 2020/01/10 14:42:54 )

So first of my dad is already retired. Mom isn't since she is 10 year younger. Anyway he thinks he get's to dictate which shifts my mom should work. My mom works in healthcare. She works with disabled people. He doesn't want her to have night shifts anymore because he doesn't want to be alone in bed. So she is not doing those anymore. Then he complained how she was working a lot during the day. Well hello! If she isn't doing night shifts anymore it will be day shifts instead. She now has a job where she can also work from home. Dad was happy because she would be at home a bit more often. But now he is angry that she is on her work phone so much. He just told her he is totally done with it. Hello! It is WORK from home! What else do you expect? Not to mention he is on his computer almost the whole day. So so what if she is on her work phone calling etc?
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Donator Posted 4 years ago ( 2020/01/10 15:04:50 )

@vengeance:
Have you talked to him about it? See his side of the story? Maybe there are parts of the situation that you don't know, yet.
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Donator Posted 4 years ago ( 2020/01/10 15:10:21 )

@Avocado: He never wants to talk about things. He just get's angry and then says he is angry about it for a while already. While he never said anything before. This goes for differnt types of subjects.
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Donator Posted 4 years ago ( 2020/01/10 15:33:12 )

@vengeance:
Well that is not super helpful of him. I don't know what he expects. Perhaps outside assistance is in order. What's your mom's stance on all this...?
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Donator Posted 4 years ago ( 2020/01/10 16:11:46 )

@Avocado: My mom says she doesn't know what he wants.
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Donator Posted 4 years ago ( 2020/01/10 16:48:08 )

@vengeance:
Well, he obviously wants his cake and to eat it, too. If he only retired recently, he was probably looking forward to spending more time with her--which, he isn't, because I expect a lot of the time she worked was when he did, so it's no more time than usual. Now he's disappointed, but either doesn't want to look dumb, is embarrassed of his feelings, or hasn't come to terms with why/that he feels the way he does.
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Donator Posted 4 years ago ( 2020/01/10 17:02:16 )

@Avocado: He has been retired 3 years ago. Yeh and they both worked 36 hours a week.
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Donator Posted 4 years ago ( 2020/01/10 17:43:18 )

@vengeance:
It can take awhile for people to come to terms with their feelings, especially if they don't necessarily feel that they're justified, or overreacting. That only makes them worse over time.
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